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THE REAL FORKS: Soul Ducks in Action
As some of you may know, I wrote a column containing a very serious, well-thought-out and compelling argument for changing over everything named “Sol Duc” to a more hip version — “Soul Duck.”
It is with great sadness that I report to you all that there is nothing in the works to make this plan a reality.
No one took me seriously.
I don’t know who you have to be to get things done around here. It isn’t the Forks Forum humor columnist, that’s for sure.
The humor columnist has no pull, which is greatly disappointing as it’s why I went into this profession.
Thankfully, I have a back-up plan and intend to run for Emblem Club president in 2016. Surely I will be able to get a few street names changed then.
Despite not getting anywhere on my “Soul Duck” project, I do have a group of followers.
There are three of them, to be precise.
They e-mailed me shortly after the column came out and said they enjoyed reading it.
This was very nice of them considering most people just tell me to keep my day job.
The joke is on those people. This IS my day job.
Anyway, as it turns out, my three supporters happen to belong to a band named … drum roll … THE SOUL DUCKS!
I didn’t get the idea from them, but rather from former Forks Forum interim editor Mark Couhig. Maybe he was a fan of theirs.
Either way, I was extremely excited by their band name and because they sent fan mail. (I’m considering it as such anyway).
At the end of their e-mail, they invited me to come check them out when they played at the Chili Cook-Off.
While I’m not a fan of chili, I figured I owed it to them since they took time out of their day to e-mail me AND because they didn’t sue me for copyright issues. That could have gotten nasty.
I showed up at the performance and stood near the stage for what seemed like hours.
I was nervous.
They were almost celebrities to me.
I haven’t actually met any celebrities. That might explain the star-struck-ness over a small town band.
I finally walked up and introduced myself.
They are a super nice group who happen to have an awesome name and a great sound.
We took some pictures and then I promptly left before everyone’s chili kicked in – and don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about either.
The point of this all is that if you write me fan mail, you will be forced to take pictures with me.
So please keep that in mind when you write in.
But it really does make me happy to receive fan mail.