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Real Forks Pop Quiz
It’s that time of the year again when I makes things up. Basically I do the same thing all year-round, but now it’s almost the 4th of July! In honor of this fabulous time for Forks residents, I present to you the first annual Forks 4th of July Quiz. I hope you studied. You’re not going to need it.
1. In what year did Forks start the Old-Fashioned 4th of July?
1. Back when “old-fashioned” was the new fashion.
2. In 1492 when Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
3. 10,000 B.C.
4. When the old gym was built, not to be confused with the new-old gym or the new-new gym.
2. Why was the demolition derby added to the events?
1. Scott Justus’ neighborhood was much too quiet.
2. The Ironman of the Hoh needed something to do with his broken down Chevy.
3. You should always pick C on all quiz questions.
4. Did you even read the above answer?
3. What was the original purpose of the frog jump?
1. To decipher which children in the area are practicing witchcraft.
2. The slug jump just wasn’t really working out.
3. I like pie.
4. All of the above.
4. Who was the first person to announce the parade?
1. Mick Dodge
2. I’m so tired of hearing about Mick Dodge.
3. Stephenie Meyers
4. I’m so tired of hearing about her, too.
5. What activity was once included on Kiddie’s Play Day in the “good ole days”?
1. Beer pong.
2. Chainsaw Toss.
3. Pin the Tail on the Live Donkey.
4. Walking to school in the snow, uphill, both ways … with no shoes.
6. What holiday does the Old-Fashioned FOURTH OF JULY usually fall on?
2. National Secretary’s Day.
4. I don’t get any real holidays because I work at a restaurant.
Thanks for playing! Send your answers to firstname.lastname@example.org and I will randomly draw one winner (Police Chief Rick Bart) to honor (make fun of) in a future column!