By Christy Rasmussen-Ford

A former teacher of mine walks into a bar …

You’re waiting for a punch line, but this isn’t a joke. She really did walk into a bar to say hi to me. Actually she just walked near the lounge next to the bar that I was working at, but you get the point.

Anyway she exclaimed, “Oh, it’s the world-famous author Christy Rasmussen!!!”

If by world-famous, she meant ALMOST small-town famous, then OK. But there are people in Forks who don’t know who I am. World-famous is a bit of a stretch.

Another recent encounter at work proves this:

A lovely family from Forks came into my work a few days ago.

One of the ladies told me that I look like Kristen Wiig. I have no idea who Kristen Wiig is. I think she has a silly last name though. Regardless, I actually have been told that and have yet to Google who she is.

Also, does anyone think to themselves that maybe Kristen Wiig looks like ME? Why does it have to be the other way around?

The lady explains to me that Kristen is a comedian.

I reply that I too am a comedian … or a wanna-be comedian anyway.

The family gives me a courteous chuckle and silently all agree that I’m not funny at all.

They apparently aren’t aware that a person can be funny in person or on paper, never both. I’m not funny in person … at all.

Very boring actually. I bore myself. People meeting me in person are probably often disappointed.

Back to the story, I ask them if they ever read the Forks Forum.

This is Exhibit A of my lack of fame; I’m fishing for compliments and recognition. A person has to do that when they are only almost famous (in a small town).

The family pauses for a moment and then one of the ladies says, “Oh, are you Christy Rasmussen?!”

I say yes and then the praises come in about my column in the Forks Forum.

They say they enjoy reading it.

Of course they do.

Who would tell me that my column sucks? Well, a lot of people would probably gladly do so, but this family was nice enough not to.

I’m receiving a lot of compliments on my column (once I explain that I am the author) which is causing my ego to grow 10 sizes.

I even said to my boss, “You should probably put a sign up outside that says something about this place being ‘Home of Christy Rasmussen, World-Famous Author.’ I think it would really drive the business in!”

He replied with, “Former Home of Christy Rasmussen.”

Former?

I’m pretty sure he was hinting at something … like that he was going to have to let me go if my fame got any larger.

Nonetheless, I’m still going to work every day. Almost famous (in a small town) doesn’t pay the bills very well.

In all seriousness, thanks for all the positive feedback and support. This column is a lot of fun to write and I’m glad that people seem to be enjoying it.