Many people have been asking me about it so I’m just going to publicly announce my exciting news; Sept. 23 will be my 11th bankiversary! That’s right. I’ve been with the world’s greatest bank (or so they say on the phone … longest phone greeting ever by the way) for 11 years on Sept. 23!
I wish I could say that Umpqua was my first and only bank, but it was not.
When I turned 18, I signed up for an account at another bank (which sounds a lot like Flank of America). They were offering free checking accounts for those turning 18. Unfortunately, by “free checking” what they really meant was that it was free ONLY if you maintain an average of $500 in your account. At 18 years old, I didn’t even know what $500 in the bank looked like. At 30, I rarely see it.
Sadly, I just barely missed the cut-off for free checking with my $19 bank account balance. This unknown balance requirement technicality (which I’m sure they honestly just forgot to mention to me) resulted in a fee, which then resulted in an overdraft , which then resulted in another fee, which then resulted in another overdraft, and eventually ended with the bank contacting me about my $630 balance. Say what? It was a very expensive class on reading the fine print.
After that fiasco, I switched over to Umpqua Bank. I remember that momentous event like it was yesterday. Having only two banks in Forks left to try out, I played “eenie meenie minie moe” and went with the winner, which was Umpqua Bank (well, Sterling then).
For the record, this is my method for making all of my important financial decisions, which the Umpqua tellers can tell just by looking at my transactions I’m sure.
In the 11 years that have followed that first day, I have seen many changes at this bank. Most significantly, Sterling became Umpqua a few years ago. Frankly, I wasn’t happy about this at all in the beginning.
However, the name is SLOWLY growing on me (I wouldn’t cry if they changed it back though). Also Sterling never offered free cake in the lobby, whereas Umpqua does.
More recently, Umpqua has really outdone themselves with their do-away-ing with deposit and withdrawal slips. For me, nothing changed because the tellers always filled mine for me anyway. For the rest of you who aren’t as lazy and spoiled as I am, enjoy the convenience of not filling out slips anymore … but just know that you could have had the tellers do it for you if you whined enough.
So anyway, in honor of 11 great years together, I’d like to invite you all to join me in celebration at Umpqua Bank on Sept. 23. Cake will be provided!
For questions, comments or to RSVP for the party, please e-mail me at [email protected]
P.S., Fine print; Umpqua didn’t technically authorize a bankiversary party for me (this column will actually be the first they hear of it), but I think they’ll be OK with it once we all show up.