Forks Community Hilton

The Real Forks: Between my epilepsy, appendectomy, occasional asthma flare-ups and complications from labor/deliveries, etc., I've been to the Forks Community Hospital more than most perhaps. I'd say that I'm a regular. Hopefully not the annoying regular that veteran employees trick the newbies into taking care of though. Because I've been there so often, I'm starting to really think they should offer some sort of frequent flier program. Maybe a rewards card? I'd even take a punch card where after 10 surgeries, you get one free! All I'm saying is that it has become standard practice for businesses to compensate regular customers.

Between my epilepsy, appendectomy, occasional asthma flare-ups and complications from labor/deliveries, etc., I’ve been to the Forks Community Hospital more than most perhaps. I’d say that I’m a regular. Hopefully not the annoying regular that veteran employees trick the newbies into taking care of though.

Because I’ve been there so often, I’m starting to really think they should offer some sort of frequent flier program. Maybe a rewards card? I’d even take a punch card where after 10 surgeries, you get one free! All I’m saying is that it has become standard practice for businesses to compensate regular customers.

Speaking of customers, a friend once told me that another hospital referred to patients as customers. Normally, I would blame President Obama and his Affordable Care Act because it just makes sense. However, it was during the Bush administration so I’ll blame W instead. It’s always one or the other anyway. I had a 50/50 chance of blaming the right one.

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Getting back to the point, this other hospital referred to patients as customers. I would consider this offensive if it weren’t for at my latest hospital stay at the Forks hospital.

I really was treated like a customer … and not the type of customer that makes you want to quit your profession either, but a VIP customer! I assume that’s how being a VIP is anyway. I’ve never actually been one before.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’ve never really had any horrible experiences at our hospital, but this time was especially wonderful. On Thursday, May 29, I had to deliver my son via C-section because he was roughly the size of a toddler. All of the staff members were extremely helpful and nice, but the nurses and aides really made my stay wonderful (or as wonderful as a surgery can be anyway).

Well, one nurse did make me get out of bed at one point, which was a horrible experience after abdominal surgery, but if not for her I would still be in that same bed … milking the C-section for at least another year.

What I’m getting at here is th

at Forks has the absolute best nurses and those nurses also have the best boss too! I’m not just saying that to get free rent either. Not that I would down turn free rent though. After all, I may or may not have a cute little hospital bill to pay. In the end, the stay was worth the price, whatever it may be.

So here’s a big thank you to everyone who treated my family and me so well when we welcomed Nolan James Ford into the world at a whopping 9 pounds, 3 ounces and 21.5 inches. As an update, he’s walking already. That’ll happen when your newborn is toddler-sized.

To reach Christy Rasmussen, check the hospital. She’s always there. The staff will not confirm or deny any information regarding my stay or condition though. That’s what happens when you’re famous … or just a regular person. It’s probably best to e-mail her at Christyrasmussen@yahoo.com.